Why young ladies prefer marrying older men 

By KHADIJAT LAWAL

Zee (real name withheld), 26, all glammed up, swings the keys to her Venza.

“You see this man they call my father, he gives me everything a young man can’t afford and I love him dearly.

“I was madly in love with Abdul (real name withheld) – our lovey-dovey lasted for years, but it was obvious he wasn’t ready and when my husband showed up, I had to leave”, she said.

Over the years, moving from the South up to the North and back down to the South, I’ve experienced a trail amongst young ladies who are interested in marrying/have married men old enough to be their fathers.

In separate chats with some of them, these ladies who pleaded anonymity said a lot of factors could be responsible for the lifetime decisions they’d taken.

Meeting the one you love – getting to spend a lifetime of togetherness – is one of the best feelings you can ever think of. And age, many say, is nothing but numbers …

Below are some of the reasons why the ladies I spoke with said they married their husbands.

Financial stability

Every woman wants comfort; a man that can take good care of her, provide her needs and assure her of a secure future when it comes to finance.

For Zee, men who are older have achieved a financial balance compared to some twenty-something year-old guys who are still trying to find a bearing.

She added that she’d rather spend her life with an old but ‘made’ man than struggle with a guy that’s just starting from the ‘scratch’.

“My husband has worked for years, he has watered the ground, all I need to do is live comfortably.

“There was no difference between myself and Abdul, we were both trying to find a bearing in life after grad”, she said.

Experience and Intelligence

There is a popular saying that “with age comes experience/wisdom”.

Bunmi, 28 (real name withheld), noted that men who are older had gone through a whole lot in life which had taught them lifetime lessons.

“Older men have seen and experienced what the twenty-something year-olds haven’t seen, they’ve gone through a lot in life, made mistakes and have learnt lessons”.

She added that they were more experienced when it comes to sex and relationship issues.

“They’ve have had the opportunity to date and come across several ladies which has given them the maturity to handle subsequent relationships better.

“Older men are also known to be good in bed as their load of experience has given them loads of expertise to deliver sexual satisfaction”.

She added that some women were attracted to married men because they thought they could satisfy them in bed because of their strong sexuality.

Effective communication

Communication is key to whatever we do in life!

Women love it when their man pays attention and listens to them carefully.

Esther, 27 (real name withheld), revealed that older men don’t have time to keep malice or wait on you to call first.

“You see ehn, all these old men don’t have time to be doing, ‘she no call me, I no go call her’

“They are straight forward and communicate issues effectively with you, they don’t mince words, they are just genuine”.

Acceptance

“An older man will accept you for who you are and will not look at the shape of your butt or whatever, this is because he is after what’s original and not the padded part of you

“He will appreciate you for who you are and will always want you to get better rather than change you”, says Bunmi.

Competition

“Like I’ve said earlier, an older man has watered the ground already, he wants you to come and relax, he doesn’t have time to say he wants to start competing with you, where do you even want to start from as a twenty-something lady,” Zee questioned.

Care and pampering

According to Chika (real name withheld), many women prefer married men because they are more caring, aware of women’s dignity and marital rights.

“They will pamper and treat you like a baby, I’m not saying young guys don’t do that as well, but the older ones do it better”. (Daily Trust)